Day One, Again

I got to 120 kg during lockdown.

Then, sometime between 2023 and 2024, I lost the weight and got down to my leanest at around 75 kg.

I didn’t have abs. I wasn’t particularly good-looking.

But I felt fit.

And, more importantly, I felt good.

I had a routine that worked.

Then a lot of things happened in mid-2024.

Slowly, I started slowing down.

My progress became less important. My discipline declined. The routine that had built me was no longer there.

By the end of 2025, I had lost almost all of the progress I’d made.

I was back around 90 kg.

And somewhere along the way, I lost most of my motivation to bounce back.

That’s probably the part that bothers me the most.

Not the number on the scale.

Not how I look.

It’s knowing that I’ve already done this before — and still managed to let it all slip away.

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August 4

I’m now 100+ kg.

I’m fat as fuck.

And honestly, I don’t want to spend another year talking about getting back in shape.

So I’m starting again.

Not with some complicated transformation plan.

Just the basics:

Training. Cardio. Diet. Sleep. MMA.

The same things that worked before.

The difference this time is that I’m not waiting to feel motivated.

I’m going to build the routine first.

Hopefully, the motivation follows.

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I don’t know where this goes.

Maybe I get back to 75 kg.

Maybe I end up somewhere completely different.

Maybe I fuck it up again.

But I’m going to document it anyway.

Not just the good days.

Not just the before-and-after photos.

The actual process.

The boring days. The missed days. The days where I don’t want to train. The days where everything clicks.

Because if I’m going to do this again, I want to remember what again actually looked like.

Day one. Again.